Okay, today is my birthday, and although I'm having a lovely day, there's some things I dislike about birthdays (did you maybe figure that out based on the title?)
1. I don't even like cake. So there goes the essential birthday event.
2. Don't you dare sing to me. I'm too awkward. Where do I put my hands? Should I make eye contact with you? Am I making a stupid face right now?! Oh, and I can feel myself blushing. Now I hate this even more.
3. Facebook posts. Stop lying! You don't care about me. You never talk to me at all the rest of the year. I don't want a bunch of pointless happy birthday messages if you don't mean them. Wait, yes I do. Okay, cross this one off the list.
4. I NEVER get puppies for my birthday, and this is unfair, probably, in some way.
5. Cards. They kill trees or something. I don't know. I just don't really like cards. That's that. I don't ever give them either, heads up. But please, if you're going to give me a card, use all the nice words you know, okay?
6. Pictures. It's basically a requirement to look good all day on your birthday because you never know when someone will stop by with a camera. (This is also the worst thing about cell phone cameras. Can't get away!) So sitting in a pile of cheesies in your underwear all day is unfortunately not usually an option.
7. Presents. Just kidding.
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